Snow day 2

yesterday was a snow day for elijah.

we were sitting at the table, eating breakfast.

big flakes of snow falling outside.

when the phone rang.

it was dan asking if i had the radio on.

i did...

volume was turned low as i was reading a book during breakfast.

the school buses were cancelled.

good to know.

school was open if i wanted to drive my boy in.

he wanted to go..then he didn't want to go.

he stayed home.

my friend drove her oldest to school and then came over with her other 2.

we had a day long playdate.

Lego, transformers, cars, playing in the snow, playing at the igloo, sledding.

it was a full day.

the roads were bad.

but the weather was great.

today they were calling for freezing rain.

woke up to school buses being cancelled.

day 2.

today i'm sitting here with a head full of snot.

a pulsating of the forehead.

i'm sore.

i'm tired, from waking up in the night.

my throat hurts when i cough, which is better than last night, when it just plain hurt.

i was thankful for the cancellation of buses.

i didn't have to get anyone ready for anything today.

i'm watching my friend's youngest today.

he and my two are playing in the livingroom as i sit here typing and enjoying sips of my hot tea 

(in my new mug - gift from Aunt Deb - thanks, i love it!)

tomorrow will be a school day.

the temperature should be above 0. (*C)

but guess what...

thursday...

PA Day.

yep.  i'll have the kids both here again on Thursday.

then friday school day.

so my son has the best week since school went back this year..

a 2 day school week!

i don't mind.  i'm home.

buses better not be cancelled tomorrow, that's all i'm sayin'!

mommy...why?

i woke this morning.

tired.

but still got up to journal and read Psalm 10.

the verse that stuck out to me this morning was:

v17

You hear, O Lord, the desire of the afflicted, 

you encourage them, and you hear their cry,

v18

defending the fatherless and the oppressed, 

in order that man, who is of the earth, may terrify no  more.

i felt good about the day ahead.

i said bye to dan.

i came down and woke my boy up.  

he couldn't find Piggie so i climbed up onto his loft bed and we looked for him.

didn't find him.

we came down and found him where he was hidden for hide n' seek the previous night.

headed to the table for breakfast.

honey nut cheerios.

my girl woke up and came out wiping her eyes.

big hugs from her.

we have to look for God (her lamb) later - she's probably wherever she had been hiding last night too.

breakfast.

laughter.

chatter.

munching of cereal.

then it was time to finish getting ready.

slowly.

the day was still good.  

then...

 we went down to get snowpants on.

i started to expect elijah to know what i was thinking.

and getting frustrated.

yes we were later getting outdoor stuff on, than usual, but not extremely late.

he wanted to keep 2 balloons that had deflated.

i told him they were going in the garbage.

he started crying.

i got angrier

more frustrated.

he had stopped getting snowpants on.

i was ready to go out.

kota was ready to go out.

(she didn't put snowpants on this morning) 

i was looking out the basement door.

annoyed.

'stupid deflated balloons..i should just take them and toss them now.'

were my thoughts.

then...

"mommy, why are you so angry with me?"

standing in the middle of the basement, 

snowpants on, 

neck warmer around his neck,

deflated balloons in his hands, 

sad eyes, 

pouting mouth, 

genuine question asked with a saddened voice.

one that had been filled with laughter when we were upstairs.

i went to him, 

he looked down.

his whole body sagged with sadness.

i helped him with his coat in silence, 

my mind shouting at me, 

'this is your boy, your 5 year old boy, he loves everything around him, these balloons are special to him, why were you getting so mad?  so what if he doesn't throw them out right away.'

i lifted his chin and looked into his sad blue eyes.

"i'm sorry.

i wasn't mad at you.

i was getting frustrated when i shouldn't have been.

you didn't do anything wrong.

you were just being a 5 year old boy.

you were being a kid.

i love you being a kid, but i wasn't letting you.

a kid finds excitement in life, in the things around him, and learning about it all"

he continued to look at me.

"i shouldn't have gotten mad at you.

that doesn't make anyone happy.

it makes you sad,

me sad,"

he continued.." kota sad, daddy sad, jack and clive sad..."

i finished, "God sad.  He wants me to have patience, 

but i didn't have any anymore did i?

thank you for reminding me how to be a kid."

after a great big hug, 

and kissing his nose

he goes...

"mommy, how about when i get home i will hug my balloons and then i'll throw them in the garbage."

how i love this boy.

what felt like it could have been a 'feel-like-a-failure-as-a-mother' morning was turned around by his one, little, sincere question.

sometimes i feel like all high and mighty..

'oh, i did devotions this morning, 

everything is going to go so smoothly now.'

so.

not.

true.

but the days when i do spend time in the Word...

i do find that i can see where God wants to work on or through me a little clearer.

and, although, still not easy peasy - 

but definitely not hopeless.

learning to read

got the sight word evaluation yesterday.

When he was reading the checked ones to me he pointed at the top middle word.

it wasn't checked.

"mommy, i know the word AND, i just didn't say it."

so i checked it.

this morning i was reading that school is actually on..

no strike..

i told him school was open but he could stay home anyway.

he then says..

"but no buses this morning."

"yes" i say, "How did you know that?"

i saw the word.

so he read BUSES too.

crazy kid.

he is expected to know all the listed words by the end of SK.

i'm just a proud mommy sharing my child's accomplishment.

2013 plans.

Tough Mudder.

i was first told of it last year.

my friend asked if dan and i would do it with her.

we were going to put a team together.

well, the plan is to do it this September.

registration for the September event isn't open just yet,

but it will be soon...

and then, commitment is made.

will we have a team?

i sure hope so.

i hope that all of us who say we want to do it.

will do it..

can do it..

it's not a race.

it's an accomplishment.

it's a team event.

(at least for most people that do it- some do it solo)

it's about completion..

it looks crazy.

it looks scary at times.

it looks AH.MAZ.ING

i'm running and bouldering a few times a week to begin training for it.

this is our 2013 plan.

i need to do this..

i want to do this.

in June i'm planning to do a 10km run.

that's goal #1

of course the sept. Terry Fox Run goal #2

and goal #3...

Tough Mudder.

2012 Toronto event video see here 

GAH!!!

try not to think that far ahead yet - let's do one month at a time.

that's me...a tough mudder!

Il Divo - Amazing Grace

i have posted this song in a different rendition before.

I sing this song...not this well, or this dramatically.. to my kids quite often when they are having a hard time falling asleep.  

when they're scared. 

when they just want to cuddle.

i have hummed this to them since they were babies.

i sang this when i was pregnant with each of them.

Last night i sang this to my little girl, with tears in my eyes.

she asked me to sing it, as she does most nights.

what made it extra special last night?

my boy asked Jesus into his heart at lunch yesterday.

then.

at supper my little girl wanted Jesus in her heart so she prayed with her daddy.

i sang this to her at bedtime.

my dad sent me this video this morning.

i wanted to share it with you.

may you know God's Amazing Grace.

(my boy is excited that he'll get to see his great grandpa in heaven one day.  

but not yet little one...not yet)

2012 in review

at the end of 2011...beginning of 2012  this is what was going on: see here

2012 in review

January: 

went to my parent's for Christmas and my dad started with radiation and chemo treatments.

elijah headed back to school and began enjoying it.

saw Mary Poppins on stage!

February:

dan and i spent valentines eve crazy carpeting around town.

March:

our little girl has a 'dog party' for her 3rd birthday.  thankfully the weather was nice and we were able to be outside.  

our boy makes a best friend at school

my dad is done chemo and radiation

April:

my parents come up for Easter.  

dan's aunt and uncle come to h'ville for a visit.  so good to see them.

May:

jack comes for a visit.  lots of fun as the kids get to know their cousin.

family road trip down to North Carolina for dan's cousin's wedding.  

my dad is cleared of cancer

June:

back home from NC

school ends, with a little boy having fond memories of school.

dan turns 32.

July:

kids have 5 nights at papa & grammas while elijah's loft bed is created

i turn 37.

our boy has his first friends birthday party...space theme.

August:

our boy turns 5

ride the Ontario Northland, down to Toronto, for the long weekend...kids first train trip.

another 4 nights (for the kids) at papa and gramma's after a day at the African Lion Safari.

September:

our boy heads back to school excited for the new year.  while his little sister longs for the day she gets to go.

we run the Terry Fox Run, with a cancer free papa.  

dan and i to Cirque du Soleil

October:

our first experience with lice.

Thanksgiving

halloween - kota a lion, elijah a power ranger

November:

go to elijah's class observation...so thoroughly encouraged.

remembrance day.  we attended the service at the legion and parade.

american thanksgiving 

December:

the world didn't end.. silly Mayans

my first dec. in a few years that i don't have a play i'm practicing for.  

we have my parents up for Christmas.  

over to dan's parents on Christmas day to visit with his aunt, uncle, cousins, and grandma.

friends over to sled on new years eve.

skype with dan's sister and kids, gpa and gma..

and then skype with papa and gramma  at 10pm.

Happy New Year.

*2013*

i plan to focus more on my family. less on the computer.

* my kids are only young once.

'kota starts school in sept.  

they won't be little for much longer, 

and i plan to enjoy this stage as much as i can.

* my husband is my best friend.

we are together for life.

i plan to enjoy life with him.  

when the kids are grown and moved out, i'll still have dan.

i want to still have things to talk about, things to laugh at... i want him to still be my best friend.

* i also plan to train to do Tough Mudder in September.